Grandmas Goulash

He could have wagered a myriad of personal belongings. Why had he opted for his horse and buggy?   He knew models must have good posture, but this was not what he’d envisioned, when he paid $5,000 for an online supermodel course.  It had seemed like a harmless flirtation until his enraged spouse evicted him. Now he lived on Drury Lane with only a platter for shelter.  

Jimmy successfully climbed the slide, but his gymnastics career had an electrifying end, when he mistook a live wire for an uneven bar. As a kid, Otis had been full of energy. As an adult, he spent his days sitting on the dock of the bay. Harvey was the butt of everyone’s jokes. He wondered if this was related to something in his childhood.

Sci Fi It had been a tranquil Sunday afternoon. Then a child, touched by a luminous alien proboscis, ran for his life and shattered their reverie.   Legal Thriller As a boy, he was always being chased by cops. No one dreamed he’d become a criminal defense attorney, now facing the case of a lifetime. Romance As a toddler, she’d admired him from a distance. Twenty years later, the age gap had closed, but he was still oblivious to her adoration.   Action Superhero Bob needed to run faster if he was going to save the day.  (Maybe he should get a fast car . . . and a driver’s license!)

Calico’s birthday was Monday, but we were all feeling too sick to celebrate properly. Today, we’re working on rectifying that. I suggested a restaurant dinner, but Calico says she’s not feeling up to it. I suspect she’s afraid that I’ll tell our server and she’ll end up surrounded by singing employees as some  DJ  wannabe announces it to the whole restaurant! Looks like it will be a home celebration. Top on our list of things to do, is the birthday girl’s favorite cake, a dense cocoa based cake, frosted with chocolate icing and served with, what else?, chocolate ice cream. It occurred to me that chocolate is one of the few things about us that screams “girly”. Our living room with its three dark recliners could just as easily be a man den. Both Calico and I have chosen careers that are dominated by men. We’re more comfortable in jeans and sneakers than dresses and heels. There’s an endless list of little things that you’d be more likely to find in an all guy house than a...

“If the other horses plague you, just walk away.” Mom’s advice wasn’t always practical.   School wasn’t hard. He was keeping right on track.  Revolution didn’t always mean change. 

Tighter Than A Glove “He’s testing some newfangled adhesive. I think they should call it Super Glue.”   Neither Sideways Nor Above It was a tough career. First he’d hit a glass ceiling. Now, he’d got stuck making a lateral move.  Unrequited Love The man was irksome. She stayed inside, pretending she didn’t hear his ardent plea: “I’m really stuck on you.”  

Too Small “I don’t carry shoes that big, Ma’am.” “Maybe if I push harder. That old woman who lives down the lane gets lots of children in her shoe.”    Too Big His delighted sisters watched him disappear into the giant shoe. Sadly, EMT’s brought an x-ray machine to locate and retrieve him. Just Right One salesman fetched shoes. Another chased her raucous kids. Mama sat and relaxed. She hated the shoes, but loved the free childcare.